TRUTH IS...

I am weak :(

It may seem like i am a strong person.
that I can handle tough situations on my own.
that after all of the hard times that i've been through,
It may seem that I am fine going through all of this alone.
That I can stand still, joke around my siblings and make them laugh,
That I am fine even if I do not show myself to my friends.
That I can still go on.

Truth is I can't.

I have been fighting this evil thought of giving up.
I have been doing my best not to break down, to continue pushing, and  inspire others to go on and do their best to fight their own battles.
that in the end, there is a light. there is hope.

that in the end, every hard work and every battle fought is worth it.

my friend, it is true. but tough times like this, when depression sets in.
I can't handle my own thoughts.
I can't keep pushing.

I feel like it's not enough.  I am not enough, to convince myself that I can do it. that I can do this.
for months I did. I've been very successful at telling myself that I can.
I know I can.
but this negative thought is eating.
the pressure is eating me.

I have no one to tell this to. because i have to show them that im strong, that i can.
but deep inside... I don't know.

I hope that when I wake up tomorrow, i'll be better.
i hope this feeling would go away.
I hope that the motivation that ive saved up would go back.

Please God, tell me i'm not alone...