I havent made time to blog and update my life.
there's just been too much going on. ive been struggling and stressing about work and work requirements.
I guess ive been pushing myself a little bit too hard and when I dont meet my goals or my own expectations i get really upset.
sooo yeah. i'm sorry for doing that to myself and do you know that feeling when youve pushed yourself too hard and you dont get the validation that you want parang napapagod ka na lang and then you stop achieving and being competitive then you realize "pucha? ano bang gusto kong patunayan? pinapahirapan ko lang sarili ko sus. pwede namang chill lang. tangina mukha lang akong tanga."
i'm that kind of person kasi na laging naghahanap ng validation. before sobra sobra lalo na nung nasa relationship pa ako until nawala na talaga but somehow ever since i started working parang bumabalik na naman eh. which is totally wrong and i think i need to get back to my old self. not really old just the me that used to be when i was preparing for boards. anyway. ive mentioned it in my previous post.
i think i need to undergo therapy. i just really need someone who will listen to all my struggles and weird shallow problems cuz i havent had a single person to talk to about what ive been going through lately....
my mom, my gosh. she's a psychic. instantly knows that im not okay whenever i get home from work and all pero of course i wont tell her. she wouldnt understand. iisa lang naman sasabihin sakin eh.
hay ewan. hormones ko lang to
nagboblog lang naman ako pag mataas na estrogen ko pag malapit na ako magkaroon (i just realized now)
oa ung stress whenever im about to have my period. it sucks being a girl but its also better than being a guy.
haha,
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